Even though I know quite a few people, I don’t feel as much of a sense of belonging as I’d like, and even when I feel it, it’s very rare. This sense of belonging comes from being member of a community. Unfortunately, the majority of people I meet up only in a one-on-one fashion, which does not build that sense of community.
Some ideas on how I could rekindle that sense of community:
When meeting up with someone, ask whether they’d like to have others tag along as well. The answer might be “no” if they want a 1:1 meet-up, which is still fine!
When inviting people to anything I organize, make it clear that anyone is welcome to bring other people as well, even if I don’t know them. (This is a very un-German and rather US thing to do.)
Have a regularly scheduled time slot for hanging out. This works virtually as well as in the physical world.
Hanging out with a group of people (rather than 1:1) is nice because it means people can take a break from being social for a bit.
The task of organising often falls to certain people within a group. Why is that? It is not (exclusively) gender bias, because this happens in all-male (gay) groups as well.
How does “being afraid to commit” play part in this? I myself find it hard to commit to something that others haven’t committed to yet, and I believe others can feel the same.